Suck it up.

Listening to: Fightstar // Nerv/Seele

Okay. Here's the thing.
I am super stressed out. My eye bags have gotten at least 2 shades darker than usual. My shoulders and neck have knots in them that before this, never existed. I have consumed copious amounts of caffeine and have tainted my sacred temple by eating more than my own body weight in unhealthy food. Spending those evenings at the library slaving away over past year papers.

Yet I've never felt happier.
I get to spend time with friends. I get to play basketball at 10pm in an empty parking lot. I gained some brain cells in the process. I've been piggy-backed and have "unleashed the dragon". I get a good excuse to drink coffee at Starbucks and eat cake.

Life is gooooood. (:
Even with exams looming over my head.

***********

I know I'm supposed to update about my life and shit. But, I'm just so lazy.
Besides. My life isn't all that interesting.

Let me think of something funny.

....

....

....

....

No. I got nothing.

Oh. Sean the Ah Beng/Irishman and En Lin the Monkeh have been inducted into my Hall of Lame.
Funny right?! Funny right?!
En Lin says that's the lamest thing he's ever heard. :D
Yay, I have lame buddies now!!

Oh. Jia Wei and I are expert fly catchers too.
Bet you can't hit them with spoons and forks!
LOSERS.

I'm so funny that I crack myself up.

Do you feel condemned just being there?

Listening to: Brand New // Jesus Christ

Jesse Lacey has one of the most haunting voices I have ever heard.
But the thing that appeals to me most are his lyrics.

Why did I not try to listen to them earlier?
The hooks, the chorus, the bridge. The words. Especially the words.

Especially The Devil and God Are Raging Inside Me.
It’s incredible listening to this album. It's soothing yet bitter. Calming ... yet you can still feel the anger, the rage surging through Jesse's screams, his whispers and the melodic riffs.
The lyrics are just so ... artistic. Indescribable, that's what they are.
Words of a poet. A writer who has the ability to strike chords in people's hearts.

It's so painfully unbelievable to know that there's so much raw talent oozing out of an individual.

And on another musician: Andrew McMahon.
The Glass Passenger. Still waiting.
Soon soon soon.

Also, the tracks on Fightstar's Alternate Endings compilation is amazing. Their B-Sides are spot on. It's funny how a lot of Fightstar's songs are inspired by Neon Genesis Evangelion.
Gah, why are they so good?

*******************
24 hours is not enough.

Shimmering like a penny out of reach in the subway grate.

Listening to: Brand New // Luca
Note: This is a scheduled post.

Yet another picture tag.

1. The age you will be on your next birthday.


2. A place you'd like to travel to.

>

3. Your favourite place.




4. Your favourite food.






5. Your favourite pet animal.



6. Your favourite color combination.



7. Your favourite piece of clothing.


8. Your all time current favourite song.
I have way too many to be able to list it all down.

9. Your favourite TV show (currently).




10. The first name of your significant other/crush.


11. The town you live in.


12. Your first job.


13. Your dream job.


14. A bad habit you have.


15. Your worst fear.


16. The one thing you'd like to do before you die.


Fin.

I am currently missing the biggest event to hit Taylors. Unhappy. )

Yay. I didn't miss it! Thanks Seng Lee, you rock my pink socks!
*dances around*

I'm not moving.

Listening to: The Script // The Man Who Can't Be Moved

Going back to the corner where I first saw you
Gonna camp in my sleeping bag, I'm not gonna move
Got some words on cardboard, got your picture in my hand
saying, "If you see this girl can you tell her where I am?"

Some try to hand me money, they don't understand
I'm not broke, I'm just a broken-hearted man
I know it makes no sense but what else can I do?
How can I move on when I'm still in love with you?

'Cause if one day you wake up and find that you're missing me
and your heart starts to wonder where on this earth I could be
Thinkin' maybe you'll come back here to the place that we'd meet
And you'll see me waiting for you on the corner of the street
So I'm not moving, I'm not moving.

Policeman says, "Son, you can't stay here,"
I said, "There's someone I'm waiting for, if it's a day, a month, a year."
Gotta stand my ground even if it rains or snows
If she changes her mind this is the first place she will go

'Cause if one day you wake up and find that you're missing me
and your heart starts to wonder where on this earth I could be
Thinkin' maybe you'll come back here to the place that we'd meet
And you'll see me waiting for you on the corner of the street
So I'm not moving, I'm not moving,
I'm not moving, I'm not moving

People talk about the guy that's waiting on a girl
There are no holes in his shoes but a big hole in his world

And maybe I'll get famous as the man who can't be moved
Maybe you won't mean to, but you'll see me on the news
And you'll come running to the corner
'Cause you'll know it's just for you
I'm the man who can't be moved
I'm the man who can't be moved.

'Cause if one day you wake up and find that you're missing me
and your heart starts to wonder where on this earth I could be
Thinkin' maybe you'll come back here to the place that we'd meet
And you'll see me waiting for you on the corner of the street
So I'm not moving, I'm not moving,
I'm not moving, I'm not moving

Going back to the corner where I first saw you
Gonna camp in my sleeping bag, I'm not gonna move.

I swear, if anyone ever serenades me with this song, acoustically, I'll love you forever.

***************************

edited.

I may be angry. And I may have spilled tears over this whole shenanigan.
But, it taught me a few things about myself. And about the people around me.

Last night, I did some much needed growing up.
An insight into what I've really been doing with myself for the past 3 years.
It hurts to recall everything in one day. It really does. Though it's so much more easier doing it with someone at your side.

I know that now.

So, I've decided not to stoop to your level.
If you're going to continue slagging me behind my back, so be it.

I will never sink so low. I refuse to.

PS. Thanks to SL, JW, YX & FG. I owe you big time. (:

***************************

But then again, I wish everything were different.

The waking up is the hardest part.

Listening to: John Mayer // Dreaming With A Broken Heart

The familiar names. Staring back at me.
Click.
I type a greeting.
Backspace.
Close window.

The familiar numbers. Plastered on the screen.
Beep.
I press the "Dial" button.
Connecting.
Cancel.

The familiar faces. Standing a few meters away.
Smile.
I raise a hand to wave.
You turn.
Withdraw.

Another day; another game of charades.
Another day; another mask of deception and lies.
Another day; another façade.

You don't know anything.
You don't know a thing about the wars that keep raging between my heart and my head.
The carnage. The destruction. The chaos.

A never-ending battle for what is left of my sanity.

Enervated and debilitated.
I can no longer distinguish between the fine threads that separate reality from fantasy.

I'm on the verge of a nervous breakdown.
So why won't you just listen instead of constantly patronizing and condemning me?

"Filthy hypocrites, all of you are the same.
Empty vessels with your sonorous sounds,
making all that you say sound completely profane,
time to choke upon the lies that you've wound."

Blardeh hell, fucking PMS.
I still feel the same way for the first part though.